Much as I want to believe that parts of this is not true, it is. When blog-hopping yesterday, I read some bits which I found quite relevant to myself, parts that really reflected how i felt. I can’t quote without permission, I suppose. But let’s just say it mirrors my heart so much, it’s quite scary.

Perhaps, I’m wrong to expect, wrong to be so selfish, wrong to be so demanding, wrong, wrong, wrong. I suppose it is my own fault to expect what I give in return. That’s no love. Giving without expecting return, that’s love. And l-o-v-e is more than a simple four-letter word. It takes that much more, so much more, it is sometimes so difficult for little hearts like ours to fully grasp and comprehend.

I remember one year’s gospel rally theme being “Love is a five-letter word”. Quite obviously, it was directing people towards the wonderful fact that Jesus is LOVE. Lovely, no? The rest of the rally remains a blur, but still, we love Him because He first loved us, and because He abides in us, we have the capacity to love others like God loves us. Hmmm.

Often times I yearn to know people I love more, and perhaps it’s my fault for closing myself up in the first place. But I do, with all my heart, want to share the burdens and happiness of my dear beloved. Yet I think, it boils down to my own attitude and behaviour.

Each time I let the broken pieces of my heart be swept up and patched up, I let it break again. But why should I be weary, why for friendship sigh, when the heart of Jesus has a full supply?

I need to learn to open up more, speak up more. Help, please, Lord.

Tomorrow, Business test. I can hardly do it, but I am going to lift myself upupup and not allow myself to downdowndown.

Love me, that’s all I ask of YOU.